A fictional street food from The Simpsons, featuring spice-and-herb-seasoned lamb kofta grilled on skewers and coated in homemade shredded pork or beef floss to recreate the cartoonishly hairy, gross appearance of the original dish. Despite its unappetizing looks, it tastes surprisingly delicious.
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Adapted from a video by Binging with Babish
Khlav Kalash from The Simpsons | Binging with Babish
ground cumin, preferably toasted and freshly ground1½ tsp
cayenne pepper¼ tsp
egg white1
kosher salt1 tsp
freshly ground black pepper
1 tsp
minced garliccloves4
shallots, small2
olive oil2 tbsp
pork floss, homemade or store-bought~½ cupest.
wooden skewerssoaked for at least 30 minutes before use~4-6est.
Steps
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1
Soak wooden skewers in water for at least 30 minutes before use.
2
Mince 4 garlic cloves and 2 small shallots, place in a cold pan with about 2 tablespoons of olive oil. Heat over medium-low, and once it starts to bubble, gently cook for 2 to 3 minutes until light golden brown, being careful not to burn them.
3
Strain out the garlic and shallots through a fine sieve, reserve the fragrant oil for other uses, and allow to cool completely.
4
In a bowl, combine 1 pound of ground lamb with the cooled garlic and shallots, 2 teaspoons of ground coriander, 1.5 teaspoons of ground cumin, 0.25 teaspoon cayenne pepper, 1 egg white, 1 tablespoon of fresh mint, 3 tablespoons of fresh parsley, about 1 teaspoon each of kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper.
5
Massage the meat mixture aggressively to make it pasty and firm, which is the opposite of what you'd do for burgers—this ensures the meat will cook up tight and stick to the skewer.
6
Shape about 3 ounces of meat into a narrow, elongated meatball, insert a skewer through one end, then smear the meat along the skewer to prevent it from falling off during cooking.
7
Place the kofta skewers in the refrigerator for at least 30 minutes before grilling.
8
Heat all four burners of the grill to maximum for 10 to 15 minutes until terrifyingly hot. Turn burners all the way down and season the grates with vegetable oil, close the lid, turn burners back up, and let cure for about 10 minutes.
9
Turn down the burners on one side of the grill and place the kofta on the hot side, searing for 2 to 3 minutes per side. Keep the meat directly over the flame and let the stick hang over the cooler side to prevent burning.
10
Flip the kofta and reposition them to prevent continued burning. Cook for another 2 to 3 minutes to get good grill marks, then move to the cooler side of the grill for indirect heat.
11
Continue cooking on the cooler side for 7 to 12 minutes until the internal temperature reaches 145°F, checking occasionally to prevent further flare-ups.
12
Remove from the grill and let rest for 5 to 10 minutes before serving.
13
To achieve the Khlav Kalash appearance, roll the cooked kofta in homemade or store-bought meat floss, covering it to resemble the hairy, meat-covered look of the cartoon dish.
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